Divorce Advice for Women (That You Can Actually Use)

September 6, 2018January 17, 2019
by Angie

It seems like there’s no shortage of divorce advice for women (and there’s also plenty of divorce advice for men) – but a lot of it just isn’t practical and some of it is pretty tired and stereotypical.

That’s why we’re giving you real, practical divorce advice for women that you can use – and that doesn’t assume that because you’re the woman, you fit into stereotypical boxes.

Divorce Advice for Women You Can Actually Use

First things first: Choose your attorney wisely. Don’t pick a lawyer who doesn’t understand that your situation is unique or that you know what you want – and what you and your children need. In most cases, women find it more beneficial to work with a divorce and family law lawyer in Stockton who doesn’t also work on criminal law cases, personal injury and other types of cases. That’s because family law is complex, and lawyers who work on divorce, child custody and other family-related issues are able to keep up with changes in the law, know how the court system works and stay familiar with the nuances associated with a break-up.

Now, on to the divorce advice for women. These five tips will help you get the best possible outcome in your divorce.

#1: Figure out your living expenses now.

Your financial situation should be your top priority. If you’re struggling now, you want to find ways to prevent that in the future – and by making your financial situation your #1 priority right now, you’ll be better prepared once your divorce is over.

Do not give in on important issues like alimony (it’s called spousal support in the courtroom) just to get things over with, especially if you know you’ll need it. Your lawyer will help you get what you deserve.

#2: Plan for future expenses.

Your soon-to-be ex might be able to kick you off his health insurance plan, you might need to find a new place to live, or you may have to dig deep into savings for car repairs and other emergencies.

Now is the time to plan for them – and you can’t count on future alimony payments to keep you covered. In fact, although your ex can get in trouble for not paying spousal maintenance, there are plenty of men who skip out on payments or try to get them lowered later.

#3: Revenge sounds sweet, but it’s really not.

A lot of women try to use the court system to exact revenge on their soon-to-be exes, and it sounds great – but it’s far more likely to backfire on you than to work. Your attorney can talk to you about “getting back” at your ex and explain why the legal system isn’t the place for it… and any therapist can tell you that the best revenge you can get on your ex is to move on and be happy. (That’s another post for another day, though.)

Do You Need Help With Your Divorce?

We have plenty of divorce advice for women that’s much more case-specific, and we’ll be happy to share it with you.

We can answer your questions about whether you’ll be required to pay or entitled to receive spousal support, how to figure out child custody and the division of property, as well as any other questions you may have or refer you to a therapist focusing on divorce issues.

Call us at (209) 546-6246 or contact us online to schedule an appointment with an attorney. We may be able to help you.

5 Family Law Tips for People Going Through Divorce

July 17, 2018August 4, 2020
by Angie

If you’re going through a divorce, there’s a good chance you could use some family law tips to make your divorce more successful. Your Stockton divorce lawyer will be able to give you one-on-one advice, but these five tips can help you through your divorce. Here’s what they are, with further explanation below.

Commit to cooperation.

Look at divorce as a legal process, not an emotional one.

Don’t try to get even.

Keep your kids out of it.

Make time for yourself and get counseling if you need it.

5 Family Law Tips for People Going Through Divorce

Divorce is one of the hardest things you’ll ever do – there’s no way to get around that. However, if you take these five family law tips to heart, you can make the process easier on your whole family.

1. Commit to Cooperation

Have a heart-to-heart with your spouse with the understanding that you both just want to make it out of this as unscathed as possible. To do that, you’ll have to agree that you’ll be willing to cooperate as much as possible.

That doesn’t mean you have to give in to everything your spouse wants. It does mean that you have to be willing to negotiate.

2. Look at Divorce as a Legal Process, Not an Emotional One

The court system is designed to help you dissolve your marriage contract and ensure that both parties involve get a “fair shake.” If you treat your divorce like the dissolution of a contract, rather than a battle for someone to win, you’ll be far better off. Negotiation is how you end a divorce quickly (and even amicably, in some cases), so don’t let your emotions get the better of you when you’re deciding what you need and want from your divorce.

3. Don’t Try to Get Even

While it can be very tempting, you can’t use the legal system to get even with your spouse – even if he or she did something exceptionally horrible. Seeking more than what you’re entitled to, or fighting over the kids, or disagreeing on things that you really don’t care about – those are all ways people try to use the legal system for revenge. The problem is that the judge is very likely to see through it, and all you’re going to do is cost yourself more time and money.

4. Keep Your Kids Out of It

Your kids need to know how much both of you love them, and that your love will never change. They need you to be reliable and dependable, and they need to keep loving both you and your ex the same way – but if you involve your children in your divorce, it’s almost as if you’re asking them to take your side. Kids don’t want to take sides, and putting them in the middle is extremely dangerous to your relationship and bad for their mental health.

5. Make Time for Yourself and Get Counseling if You Need It

It’s hard to be stressed day after day, and it seems like you’re being pulled in a million different directions. But now, more than ever, it’s important for you to take time for yourself. If you’re not practicing proper self-care, you can’t make the best decisions.

If you think you need therapy, try talking to a counselor or therapist who has experience helping people who are going through divorce.

Tag: <span>Revenge</span>

Divorce Advice for Women (That You Can Actually Use)

Divorce Advice for Women You Can Actually Use

#1: Figure out your living expenses now.

#2: Plan for future expenses.

#3: Revenge sounds sweet, but it’s really not.

Do You Need Help With Your Divorce?

5 Family Law Tips for People Going Through Divorce

5 Family Law Tips for People Going Through Divorce

1. Commit to Cooperation

2. Look at Divorce as a Legal Process, Not an Emotional One

3. Don’t Try to Get Even

4. Keep Your Kids Out of It

5. Make Time for Yourself and Get Counseling if You Need It

Do You Need More Family Law Tips?