Divorce Stress: How 2 Navigate the Storm

September 5, 2024September 5, 2024
by Dr. Thomas Maples

Divorce is one of life’s most stressful experiences. The emotional turmoil and significant life changes can leave individuals feeling overwhelmed and vulnerable. Understanding the most common sources of stress during divorce can better prepare you to cope with this challenging period.

1. Emotional Turmoil

The end of a marriage often triggers a rollercoaster of emotions – sadness, anger, guilt, fear, anxiety, and loneliness are just a few. These emotions can be intense and unpredictable, making it difficult to function normally. The loss of companionship and the shattered dreams of the future can lead to feelings of grief and despair. If you find yourself having emotional difficulties, this is normal. However, you may sometimes need to seek help outside of your attorney when dealing with the complex emotions that arise during and after your divorce. If this is the case, you may want to consider seeing a marriage and family therapist or counselor to help you navigate the emotional landscape that occurs during a divorce.

2. Financial Strain

Divorce often leads to a significant decrease in financial resources, especially if a spouse is financially dependent during the marriage. Legal fees, dividing assets, and establishing two separate households can create considerable financial strain. Furthermore, the fears associated with financial uncertainty can create a snowball effect because financial insecurity affects nearly every other life domain including relational, physical, emotional, and spiritual well-being. Working with a team, including your family law attorney, financial planner, and a personal well-being coach or therapist can help you navigate the stressors commonly associated with the burdens financial stress can create.

3. Child Custody Battles

For couples with children, child custody battles can be one of the most stressful aspects of divorce. The legal process, the emotional impact on the children, and the fear of losing time with them can cause immense anxiety and stress for both parents. Many times, child custody problems also lead to issues around support and other financial stressors listed above. When facing child custody and support problems, it is imperative to hire a competent attorney who is well-versed in the complexities of family law matters. That is where our team at Maples Family Law can help.

5. Legal Complexities

Divorce entails a complex and often intimidating legal process involving paperwork, court appearances, and negotiations. The need to protect legal and financial interests can lead to emotionally charged negotiations, contributing to the stress associated with divorce. Individuals should assess their strengths and seek assistance from professionals to navigate the legal complexities and emotional challenges of divorce successfully.

6. Coping with Stress During Divorce

While divorce is undeniably stressful, there are ways to cope and navigate this challenging period:

Seek Legal Guidance: Consult with an experienced divorce attorney to understand your rights and navigate the legal process.

Seek Professional Help: Therapists can provide emotional support and coping strategies.

Build a Support System: Lean on friends, family, or support groups for understanding and encouragement.

Practice Self-Care: Prioritize sleep, exercise, and healthy eating to maintain physical and emotional well-being. Listen to inspirational Podcasts or read inspirational blogs to help you understand and navigate your emotions while creating a new direction for your life.

Focus on the Future: Set goals and visualize a positive future to maintain hope and motivation.

7. Conclusion

The most common sources of stress during divorce include emotional turmoil, financial strain, child custody battles, and legal complexities. Emotional turmoil involves a rollercoaster of emotions like sadness, anger, and loneliness. Financial strain arises from decreased resources, legal fees, and establishing separate households. Child custody battles can be incredibly stressful, involving legal processes and emotional impact on children. Legal complexities, including paperwork and negotiations, can also contribute to stress.

Coping mechanisms include seeking legal guidance and professional help, building a support system, practicing self-care, and focusing on the future.

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Divorce

3 Questions to Ask Yourself Before You File for…

September 22, 2019August 13, 2020
by Angie

If you’re like most people who are considering divorce, you know you need a lot of information to make an informed decision. Before you file for divorce, you need to ask yourself three very important questions – and you have to come up with the right answers before you can make the right choice.

3 Questions to Ask Yourself Before You File for Divorce

Before you file for divorce, ask yourself:

How will a divorce impact me financially?
How will a divorce impact my day-to-day life?
Are there other options?

Let’s take a closer look at each of these so you can make the most informed decision possible. We also recommend consulting with a Stockton divorce lawyer who can explain the divorce process to you and answer all your case-specific questions.

#1. Before You File for Divorce: How will a divorce impact me financially?

There’s no doubt that divorce will have a financial impact on you, your spouse and your kids. However, the impact depends on whether you both work, how much each of you contributed to the marriage, and whether you’re able to continue working the way you did while you were married.

Child Support

When you go through a divorce with children, someone is getting child support – and that means the other party is paying it. The amount of child support that changes hands is largely based on the non-custodial parent’s income, which means that the person who has the children most of the time will most likely be the recipient.

Spousal Maintenance

Alimony might be a possibility in your divorce, too. If your spouse makes less than you (or nothing at all), he or she can ask the court to award spousal maintenance. Likewise, if you’re the lesser-earning spouse, you have every right to ask the court for alimony. Alimony can be temporary (only during your divorce) or it can be more permanent, sometimes lasting for months or even years. However, there’s no way to predict how a judge will rule when it comes to spousal maintenance (unlike child support, which the state of California requires for minor children). You can’t count on receiving or paying it until you have a signed order from the judge.

#2. Before You File for Divorce: How will a divorce impact my day-to-day life?

You may not think divorce will impact your day-to-day life that much, particularly if you and your spouse have been separated or you rarely spend time together. However, if you’re a former stay-at-home mom who hasn’t been to work since you had children, it’s a big prospect – and it can be overwhelming. You’ll have to plan to get a job, find caregivers for your children and, in many cases, change your schedule around to accommodate visitation and your own time with the kids.

You’ll have to plan for these things during the divorce process. Typically, parents address things like childcare while they’re working out a custody agreement. Your attorney can help you make the right plans, too – you don’t have to do it alone.

#3. Before You File for Divorce: Are there other options?

In most cases, divorce isn’t your only option. (This doesn’t apply to cases of abuse or other significant issues.) You may be able to make other arrangements that suit your family better, such as living apart but still together, or filing for a legal separation but stopping short of divorce. You may also be able to attend marital counseling with a licensed therapist or talk to someone you trust about the issues you’re experiencing in your marriage. If both parties are willing to work at it, it’s possible to repair a marriage that first appeared beyond saving.

Are You Thinking About Divorce?

Often, people think about divorce and try to make rational, logical decisions without having all the facts. If you’re thinking about divorce, it’s usually a good idea to consult with a Stockton divorce attorney who can answer your questions and explain the process to you. Once you’ve talked to an attorney, you’ll fully understand whether it’s an option for you – and you’re under no obligation to actually get a divorce just because you talked to a lawyer.

If you’d like to discuss your options and learn about how divorce might be one of them, call us at (209) 989-4425 or get in touch with us online to talk to a lawyer who can help today. We’ll help you with every question you have about divorce, from child custody and child support to alimony and property division.

Divorce

5 Divorce Finance Tips to Ensure You’re Prepared

April 17, 2017August 13, 2020
by Angie

Whether you’re thinking about filing for divorce or you’re already working on developing a parenting plan, one thing’s for certain: You need to have a financial plan in place. Most people who divorce in Stockton (and everywhere else, for that matter) notice a substantial change in circumstances, and that’s true whether they were part of a one-income or two-income household.

5 Divorce Finance Tips to Ensure You’re Prepared

While it’s always helpful to ask friends and family for divorce finance tips and advice, your best bet may be to turn to a professional if you’re not sure how to prepare for your divorce. Your attorney can help you find a financial adviser if you feel you need one. However, most people—with a little forethought and planning—are able to transition smoothly.

Divorce Finance Tip #1: Separate Your Finances and Close Joint Accounts

Your attorney will be able to help you plan the timeline for your divorce, such as when you should move out of your marital home and handle other affairs. Before you do any of that, though, it’s a good idea to start separating your finances from your spouse’s and begin working toward financial independence.

For most people, a logical first step toward financial independence during divorce is to separate your joint accounts. If you can, close the accounts you shared; if you can’t close them or your spouse is unwilling to cooperate, see if you can remove your name from them. Do the same with joint credit card accounts.

Divorce Finance Tip #2: Open New Accounts Right Away

Open your own checking and savings accounts as soon as possible, and update your bank information with your employer to make sure your paychecks are deposited in the correct account.

You should never drain your spouse’s account or a joint account during divorce. Doing so can get you into serious hot water with the court.

Divorce Finance Tip #3: Change Your Will

Just to be on the safe side, remove your spouse from your will and make sure he or she doesn’t have any powers of attorney on your behalf. If your soon-to-be ex-spouse has the authority to make financial, healthcare, or end-of-life decisions for you, you’ll need to revoke that authority and give it to someone else.

Divorce Finance Tip #4: Replace Beneficiaries

If your spouse is listed as the beneficiary on your life insurance policy, your 401(k) or IRA, or anything else, replace him or her with someone else.

Divorce Finance Tip #5: Develop Your Own Credit

If you don’t already have lines of credit established in your name, now is probably the time to start some. Landlords and lenders often get your financial information from your credit report, and it can be difficult to find a place to rent, obtain a mortgage, or get a car loan if you don’t have credit that’s solely in your name.

What if You’re Not Working?

If you’re not currently working, talk to your attorney about spousal support and whether you should begin looking for a job. Spousal support can be temporary or permanent; typically, the judge’s support order is considered temporary when you’re still going through your divorce and becomes permanent once your divorce is final. (“Permanent spousal support” doesn’t mean it’s going to be paid forever. It simply means that the order from the judge is permanent, and the support order stays in effect until a certain amount of time has elapsed, the receiving spouse remarries, or another condition is met.)

Do You Need to Talk to a Lawyer About Divorce?

If you need to speak to an attorney who practices family law in Stockton, CA, we’d love to help you.

Call us at 209-910-9865 to discuss your situation. We’ll begin developing a strategy and, if necessary, work on the appropriate paperwork to file for spousal support during your divorce.

Tag: <span>Divorce Finance</span>

Divorce Stress: How 2 Navigate the Storm

1. Emotional Turmoil

2. Financial Strain

3. Child Custody Battles

5. Legal Complexities

6. Coping with Stress During Divorce

7. Conclusion

More from Dr. Thomas Maples

A Sacred Journey Podcast

3 Questions to Ask Yourself Before You File for…

3 Questions to Ask Yourself Before You File for Divorce

#1. Before You File for Divorce: How will a divorce impact me financially?

Child Support

Spousal Maintenance

#2. Before You File for Divorce: How will a divorce impact my day-to-day life?

#3. Before You File for Divorce: Are there other options?

Are You Thinking About Divorce?

5 Divorce Finance Tips to Ensure You’re Prepared

5 Divorce Finance Tips to Ensure You’re Prepared

Divorce Finance Tip #1: Separate Your Finances and Close Joint Accounts

Divorce Finance Tip #2: Open New Accounts Right Away

Divorce Finance Tip #3: Change Your Will

Divorce Finance Tip #4: Replace Beneficiaries

Divorce Finance Tip #5: Develop Your Own Credit

What if You’re Not Working?

Do You Need to Talk to a Lawyer About Divorce?