5 Family Law Tips for People Going Through Divorce

July 17, 2018August 4, 2020
by Angie

Angie

If you’re going through a divorce, there’s a good chance you could use some family law tips to make your divorce more successful. Your Stockton divorce lawyer will be able to give you one-on-one advice, but these five tips can help you through your divorce. Here’s what they are, with further explanation below.

Commit to cooperation.
Look at divorce as a legal process, not an emotional one.
Don’t try to get even.
Keep your kids out of it.
Make time for yourself and get counseling if you need it.

5 Family Law Tips for People Going Through Divorce

Divorce is one of the hardest things you’ll ever do – there’s no way to get around that. However, if you take these five family law tips to heart, you can make the process easier on your whole family.

1. Commit to Cooperation

Have a heart-to-heart with your spouse with the understanding that you both just want to make it out of this as unscathed as possible. To do that, you’ll have to agree that you’ll be willing to cooperate as much as possible.

That doesn’t mean you have to give in to everything your spouse wants. It does mean that you have to be willing to negotiate.

2. Look at Divorce as a Legal Process, Not an Emotional One

The court system is designed to help you dissolve your marriage contract and ensure that both parties involve get a “fair shake.” If you treat your divorce like the dissolution of a contract, rather than a battle for someone to win, you’ll be far better off. Negotiation is how you end a divorce quickly (and even amicably, in some cases), so don’t let your emotions get the better of you when you’re deciding what you need and want from your divorce.

3. Don’t Try to Get Even

While it can be very tempting, you can’t use the legal system to get even with your spouse – even if he or she did something exceptionally horrible. Seeking more than what you’re entitled to, or fighting over the kids, or disagreeing on things that you really don’t care about – those are all ways people try to use the legal system for revenge. The problem is that the judge is very likely to see through it, and all you’re going to do is cost yourself more time and money.

4. Keep Your Kids Out of It

Your kids need to know how much both of you love them, and that your love will never change. They need you to be reliable and dependable, and they need to keep loving both you and your ex the same way – but if you involve your children in your divorce, it’s almost as if you’re asking them to take your side. Kids don’t want to take sides, and putting them in the middle is extremely dangerous to your relationship and bad for their mental health.

5. Make Time for Yourself and Get Counseling if You Need It

It’s hard to be stressed day after day, and it seems like you’re being pulled in a million different directions. But now, more than ever, it’s important for you to take time for yourself. If you’re not practicing proper self-care, you can’t make the best decisions.

If you think you need therapy, try talking to a counselor or therapist who has experience helping people who are going through divorce.